For this episode I sat down with Dee Hartmann and Elizabeth Wood, co-authors of The Pleasure Prescription and two of the most respected voices in women's pelvic health. I wanted to have the conversation so many women have quietly, and rarely with anyone qualified to actually answer: what do you do when sex hurts, and why does no one tell you that hurting is not the deal you signed up for.
Pleasure Has Been Hijacked
Dee and Elizabeth opened with something I think about often, the word pleasure itself has been hijacked, turned into something indulgent or shameful rather than a basic signal your body is designed to give you. Reclaiming the word is part of reclaiming the experience.
The Anatomy No One Taught Us
We went deep into the actual anatomy and function of the clitoris, information most of us were never given in any classroom, and how that gap in basic education leaves women guessing about their own bodies well into adulthood. Dee and Elizabeth were clear and direct: pain with sex is not normal. It has causes, it has treatment, and it does not have to be managed by simply enduring it.
Bundles of Joy
One idea from the conversation has stayed with me since, the practice of noticing "bundles of joy," small, specific pleasures throughout an ordinary day, a perfect cup of tea, a particular quality of light. Building that muscle of noticing pleasure in small, safe places makes it far easier to access in more vulnerable ones.
Communication and Consent, Said Plainly
We talked about what actually fosters good sex: open communication, real self-awareness, and consent treated as an ongoing conversation rather than a single checkbox at the start. None of it is complicated. Most of it is simply never said out loud.
"Pleasure is not only a right. It is a transformative force that can enrich every part of a life."
Listen to the full episode
Episode 18, Empowering Women Through Pleasure, on The Scrumptious Woman.
This conversation is part of Juliette Karaman's body-based work on touch, desire, and structured connection.
Work with Juliette: feelfullyyou.com/work-with-me