Episode 44 Exploring Erotic Blueprints, Spiritual Identity, and the Taboo of Orgasmic Death with Jaiya

On: Dec 8, 2023

Welcome to another episode of “The Scrumptious Woman” with Juliette Karaman. In this episode, Juliette engages in a thought-provoking conversation with Jaiya, exploring topics ranging from the journey of self-discovery and erotic blueprints to the spiritual aspects of identity and the taboo topic of orgasmic death.

The episode delves into the exploration of self-identity, eroticism, and the profound experiences that shape our lives. Jaiya shares her insights on the erotic blueprints, a framework to understand one’s erotic self, and the transformative journey it offers. The conversation takes an unexpected turn as Jaiya and Juliette discuss the spiritual dimensions of identity, the preparation for death, and the potential for an orgasmic experience in the process.

Key Takeaways:

  • Erotic Blueprints: Jaiya introduces the concept of erotic blueprints, providing a tool for individuals to understand and embrace their unique erotic selves.
  • Spiritual Exploration: The discussion expands into spiritual realms, contemplating the journey beyond identities and the potential for pleasure and freedom in death.
  • Preparation for Death: Jaiya shares a personal experience of being guided through the Bardo, prompting reflections on the beauty and challenges of preparing for death.
  • Orgasmic Death: The taboo topic of orgasmic death is touched upon, raising intriguing questions about the potential for pleasure in the ultimate surrender.

Whether exploring the realms of eroticism or contemplating the mysteries of life and death, this episode invites listeners to join a reflective and transformative conversation.

Resources Links:

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Transcription:

The Scrumptious Woman EP44

Tue, Dec 05, 2023 3:37PM • 47:06

SUMMARY KEYWORDS

blueprints, feel, love, pleasure, shapeshifter, sexuality, people, body, realisation, touch, sex, beautiful, turned, eroticism, energetic, book, erotic, life, orgasm, happening

SPEAKERS

Juliette Karaman, Jaiya

Juliette Karaman  00:00

Welcome to another episode of this scrumptious woman. And I have with me my mentor of five years now Jaiya, who is also the creator of the erotic blueprints, and your book is coming out tomorrow.

Jaiya  00:18

Yay. It’s such a momentous thing to have a book come out, you know, it’s like, feels like it’s been a decade in the making. But finally it’s here.

Juliette Karaman  00:27

It’s incredible. Right? And I know that you’ve had, this has been such a journey for you. I know, this has been decades in the making. You have been in conscious sexuality, tantra, everything for two decades more? How long has it been

Jaiya  00:45

almost three, it’s going on almost three decades. Now. I started when I was 19. And I’m going on 47. So you know, I got two more years, it will have been 30 years. And you know, even before I was 1919, was just like, well, it was actually when I was 18. Because I couldn’t wait to turn 18. So it could play in the realm of sexuality. So you know, I really started younger and energy work and you know, things that were not as taboo when you’re under 18. And then the minute I turned 18 was like the day I couldn’t wait, I was like, off to the races. So yeah, I’ve been doing this since I was a teenager.

Juliette Karaman  01:23

It’s just incredible. And I know you’ve written loads of books. So writing books is not something new. But it kind of feels this has really been your baby.

Jaiya  01:32

Yeah, I would say that this book is the most authentic. My first book was called Red Hot touch. It was, you know, they reached out to me to see like, Would you like to write a book on erotic massage? And I was like, Sure, sure. So that that book, you know, was was on massage, which was great. But for me, sexuality has always been this journey of awakening. And it has always been about our human self realisation and your spiritual self realisation. And so it feels like I’ve come full circle, because it was almost like I needed to go mainstream, I needed to, like, do all the sex tips and do all the mainstream type of things. And now I can really come back to what’s true to my heart, which is really about this journey of awakening, and sexuality as a tool to that awakening.

Juliette Karaman  02:24

And I love this, because people asked me off, it’s like, how did you get on this ascension path? And I’m like, conscious sexuality, my way it was sexuality. Its money or its relationships, or it’s something else, right? Or it’s business. And for me, exactly, it’s Yeah, I mean, similar, but very different path. And I remember coming across you and I had done Tantra, BDSM, had gone through a lot of trauma, orgasmic meditation, and all of a sudden, I came and listened to you and the blueprints, and I was like, Oh, I gotta learn how to do this. I’ve kind of become a coach. And I didn’t know that you could learn how to, like, do the blueprints without becoming a coach. So I just jumped in. And that’s been like the end of that.

Jaiya  03:16

I love that. I mean, for me, it’s always like, better, I don’t know better. I’m putting in quotes, but like, it’s more valuable for me to just go to the coaching programme, oftentimes, because then I’m just, I’m also helping others. And so I’ve learned it even more diligently. I guess it just helps me because I know, oh, if I’m going to have to teach this, then I really need to learn the content. So true,

Juliette Karaman  03:39

right? Really, like when you learn how to teach, or I keep saying is like, what I teach is what I needed to learn. I was like, Oh, this came up because I needed to teach it so others can learn it so I can learn it first. I love it. Will you take us through a bit of how this baby was born?

Jaiya  04:03

Yeah, so in my profession, I’m a somatic sexologist, which means that I’m much more hands on than say a sex therapist would be who would mostly work with the psyche emotional aspects, I really look at the whole picture of everything. And so I’m looking at what’s happening somatically are in the body. And it was one day I was really I was there’s a couple of things that contributed one was my own relationship with my partner in and how we were really struggling at the time and really couldn’t figure out was like, here I am kind of like the sex expert in my own sexless situation at the time. So there was that pain that was happening. You know, I’m rolling over at bed at night and just like crying myself to sleep because I feel incongruent with my life’s purpose in my life work. And then there was also at the same time, a handful of clients I was working with who were having trouble, like similar troubles. I don’t know if you have this in your practice, too, but it’s like, oh my gosh, sometimes my clients are like my best teachers. And so here Here I was, you know, working with couples in similar situations where it felt like they had a mismatch, or it felt like, you know, things just weren’t clicking arousal wise. And so I was in my office and I was working with this couple, and he was having a hard time getting an erection. And we were just hovering our hands over his body just to see like how sensitive he was. And he started having these waves of orgasmic energy moving through his body. And this is not a guy who is like, a woowoo, you know, into all those kinds of stuff. This is like a meat potatoes kind of guy. And, and so he’s just like, wide eyed looking at me, and you know it. And I think it also came from a lot of my mentors too. And learning over the years like Joe’s people like Joseph Kramer, people like Astaire, Parral, who wrote mating in captivity, she talks about an erotic blueprint in her book. And so in the Enneagram, like looking at Personality Typing systems, and it was like, in that moment, it all clicked, everything just went, like I don’t know, if you’ve ever had like those moments of like download that was just like something just downloaded. It was like, Oh, we’re all wired differently when it comes to eroticism. And my particular client that day was wired energetically, which then, you know, when she his wife was trying all these sexual techniques, they weren’t working, because it was too much. And it was short circuiting his whole system. So all of a sudden, he started having all this arousal, because we were suddenly speaking the way that his body was wired.

Juliette Karaman  06:32

Isn’t that beautiful? Right? And completely, the codes all of a sudden drop in, right? It’s like, oh, this is what it was. And it just like, it’s like the computer programme, all of a sudden runs, and you’re like, Whoa, and then to see this on your clients were different kinds of touch. It’s incredible. I had a couple that she’s she’s a trauma expert. And they were asking, Hey, can you help our sex life a little bit. And in the 15 minutes that we spoke, it was like, I just had him touch her and have her feel safe. And the whole situation just changed. Like, she’s like, how did you know that? I’m like, darling, the body doesn’t mind.

Jaiya  07:16

Yeah, we start to be able to see it. You know, for me, I just walk around just listening to how people talk. Or like, if I’m at an event, somebody could stand up and talk. And I’m like, okay, there, that blueprint there, this blueprint, like I can usually identify it pretty quickly. And then what’s beautiful about it is when you speak someone’s language, or you can see who they are, then it’s like you’re honouring that human being, you know, you’re seeing who they are. In that moment, you’re really honouring who they are, and they felt seen and heard, and they feel safe. And that when they feel seen and heard through touch, are you the word you’re using?

Juliette Karaman  07:47

Beautiful. So you had this client experience, the download the codes that came through, you’re like, Okay, I’ve got to teach this. And that’s how you really started. I mean, it’s been like five years, we do check this long, yes,

Jaiya  08:02

well, I spent five years in my private practice before I taught it, because I, you know, I’m one of those people who’s like, really cautious, like, Okay, I’ll have this experience, or I’ll have something like that. And, but let’s test it, let’s actually see if those downloads work resonate are something that is powerful. And so that was like, it was around 2011, when that happened. And you know, it completely I started using in my own relationship completely changed our relationship, as we uncovered who we were, and could learn and honour each other and who we were. And then it started transforming my private client work. So that, you know, I just, I just was like, okay, all my private clients, it’s time let’s do this, let’s, you know, like, let’s learn as much as I can from my clients, but also, they were learning for me these blueprints. At first, I only had three, then I had four, then I had five. And so and then it just really landed. And then I had my first speaking gig on it, and, and that that really landed and then the next one, and it was just like, oh my gosh, this is really landing. Like there’s something really here with us. And it was in 2016, that we had our first course on it. And we had, you know, a couple of 100 people who signed up for that. And like 10,000 people who took the quiz at that time, and I was I was starting to see a movement happening. And I was starting to see a vision where one day, you know, millions of people would know this. And one day it would be on bookshelves. And you know, it’s interesting to see since then, you know, sex, love and goop the TV show and millions of people now have taken the quiz and now there’s a book you know, that’s going to be on the bookshelf. So it’s just such a beautiful thing. And it has really been over, you know, over a decade that this framework, this language for people to use has come to fruition.

Juliette Karaman  09:59

Oh, I just think it’s an incredible way. And today I was actually I was being interviewed another podcast and they were asking me so so what do you do? So I kind of like gave them a bit of a little spiel about the blueprint. So I’m like, It’s if you know your love language, you also need to know your pleasure language, and also recognise what the pleasure language is of your your partner, and how do you give and how do you receive because it’s also different. And he was just like, I never heard. Right. But it’s, I love it. I love that you you’ve brought this to life, and we have an incredible community, you have an incredible community, I’m part of it. So I think we love and I love that ens part of it your partner, and then you have like, incredible peeps helping you there as well. Thank you.

Jaiya  10:56

Yeah, that was another thing was just like, well, three things, I think that are important in sexuality because it’s so taboo, it’s been something we don’t want to talk about is creating a conversation that’s open. having compassion within that conversation. And then sharing within community. I think having a sex positive community and, you know, having other people who are on this journey with you, and people who could become peers, and connection as you’re going through, this is a very important thing. And, you know, I often have this thing of like, oh, I don’t want to start like a sex cult or anything like that. I’ve been very, like cautious about that, and really have researched a lot about, well, how do we build community that’s empowered and has agency and it isn’t about me, you know, I never wanted it to be about me, which is why we created the coaches and, you know, have other people who lead because I never wanted to create followers, I just wanted to create people who were also leaders and helping others come to self realisation and heal, and you know, and shame. And so the community is really powerful in that way that it’s uplifting each other, and a place that safe to come and explore. Completely.

Juliette Karaman  12:13

That’s one of the things that I hear from everyone. They’re like, Oh, my God, you get so much when you do the course. I’m like, yes, these aren’t even even but you get the whole community. Right. And there’s, there’s so much support there. So can you take our listeners, I know a lot of people will have heard about it, but some people might not have heard what they actually are these erotic blueprints?

Jaiya  12:37

Yeah, absolutely. So the first one is energetic. And that’s someone who is turned on by anticipation, space T’s longing yearning, it’s in the space in between, and the not having sometimes is when all of the turn on arises. And so I don’t know if you’ve ever had that moment, like before you kiss somebody, and then it’s like, oh, the energy is there before you kiss them, and then you kiss the metallic Oh, then you might be an energetic. So the energetic superpower is being able to have orgasms without being touched. And also in the shadow side, because every blueprint has something that really turns you on. And then on the other side, it has something that really turns you off. So the shadow side is you turn off because something is too much too quick. It just it just short circuits, your whole body and your whole being the other shadow side can be not being able to really say no and set really clear boundaries. Because everything gets kind of mushy with the energetic in terms of their own personal space and boundaries and their ability to say no. The next one is the sensual and the essential is someone who’s turned on by all of their senses being ignited. So this is Smell Taste touch, they bring the beauty to the erotic experience. And on the shadow side, however, they can get caught up in their head feeling the environment is off, like oh, that pillow is crooked or something’s not right, that temperature is not right. The music’s not right, my partner’s breaths not right, and they lose the pleasure that’s in between their legs. Then, the sexual is someone who is turned on by what we think of as sex in our culture. So this could be penetration, nudity, orgasms, you know, getting right to it. That kind of like way of like getting to the climax, getting to the end goal. And for a sexual sex is something that they really need. It’s not just like a want it’s like food or air or water to a sexual. The shadow side, however, is that they miss this journey, the other Blueprints that are there and they can get really limited in their definition of sex that sex equals penetration or sex equals coming to a climax, as opposed to all the other ways in which we can start to really explore our sexuality outside of the standard narrative of kissy Kissy, Licky licky and Suceava Then we go into the intercourse and so that’s that’s just one narrative and so I feel like that can be very, very limited and we get stuck as a culture that limited definition of what successful sex is. And the fourth one is the kinky blueprint and the kinky is someone who’s turned on by the taboo so that’s anything that’s taboo for you and that could be psychological based kink, which means more power play or power dynamic or it can be sensation based kink, which is ropes you know, impact play like spanking something like that or combination of both of those things. The shadow side of the kinky is a lot of shame Why am I turned on by this? Why do I like this, this this is out of the box I shouldn’t like this. And so that can shut down some of the incredible creativity that can keep blueprints have and endless exploration that they can have. And then the shapeshifter, the shapeshifter, someone who’s heard all by all of those things, they love it all. They want it all they want more of it. And the superpower is that they can shape shift to play with anybody, they can have the orgasmic possibilities within all the different blueprints. However, on the shadow side, because they are shape shifting, oftentimes, they aren’t fully fed. They don’t feel satiated, and their sexual expression. And they’re often shut down as too much to you know, they’re just there’s big. And so I like to break apart that mythology, it’s more that they’re erotically sophisticated. They’re very radically intelligent. I think that we’re actually all shapeshifters. And we’ve just been conditioned out of it in our blueprint shows us where we’re limited in one area that we’ve developed. And I think it’s oftentimes what we get into a relationship with someone else who isn’t the same blueprint is because we’re trying to complete ourselves

Juliette Karaman  16:44

completely. And I remember for me, when all of a sudden, I found a shapeshifter and I’m a shapeshifter. I was like, oh my god, does it get to be this good?

Juliette Karaman  17:02

Give me more and more and more. And then sometimes less, and that’s my energetic, really? Oh, my God, that has probably been the biggest one that came on board the last five years. Hmm.

Jaiya  17:16

Yeah, I think it’s a place where the energetic blueprint is a place where we feel a little weird, or we feel a little woowoo or this, this isn’t like possible. So I feel like it’s really just undeveloped, culturally, unless you go to something like Tantra, you know, where you maybe you’ve grown up with tantric teachings or some things that are more transformational types of conscious sexuality, that there can be a lot of expansion there. But I think, just in general, we don’t we we only touch the tip of the iceberg of what’s possible when it comes to our eroticism. And it’s something that I talked about in the book is just like, here, there are so many possibilities, we can go to multi dimensional sexuality, we can, you know, I talk about an orgasm that I had with one of my lovers, I say it was I remember your star orgasm. Because I went into this expanded state of consciousness, and all of a sudden, we were the cosmos, and I remembered when we were stars, and that I’d come into a body just so I could experience that again, you know? So very interesting things can happen in that realm.

Juliette Karaman  18:20

But that’s the beauty. Right? And if you’re with someone that can also feel that much. It’s like, Well, really, I mean, yeah, I remember going to those places. And I’m like, Oh, my God, and like French, they got a little, little deaf booty Ma, right. And it’s like, that’s exactly what happens. You go through everything. So really, really beautiful. How, explain to me so people are listening to this. And they’re like, Oh, I think I’m sensual. And I’m probably a shapeshifter. So that’s where you think from your head. Right? So how would you get them to actually really tap into that? What’s what’s the next step?

Jaiya  19:01

Yeah, so the first step is taking the quiz. And that’s all the stuff from the head, you know, or if you’ve heard me talking, you’re like, Oh, I think I might be this this and that is from there. But the body also has information about what turns you on. And to me, the body’s even more accurate because we can see the physical turned on that’s happening in the body. And sometimes there’s a difference in the brain and the body and I often see this mostly with the kinky blueprint, because people don’t even even they haven’t explored it or they’re like, oh, I don’t want to like those things. But then we get into the body and the body is like oh my god, that’s such a that’s just like such a big turd on. And so there are games you can play. There are things that you can do to start to explore in your own body. What really turns you on. And I’m sure you’ve led many people through those games Juliet. You know, for me, it’s always so fun because it’s so telling of a truth and there’s so much discovery of like, oh wow. didn’t even know my ankles were a place of turn on. And if you touch it energetically like in little small circles with your fingertips. Wow. And so I love I love just the aha was in the breakdown of limiting beliefs or the breakdown of who you thought you were. And then all of a sudden, you start to see these truths that are happening through the touch in the body. And that can be really profound.

Juliette Karaman  20:25

It’s beautiful, right? I mean, I love getting people on my table or having them on the table in front of me on Zoom, and just explaining how to touch each other. And then say, be noticed what’s going on what’s going on and her breath what’s Where do you see the goose pimples? What’s what’s going on? She’s like, Oh, my God, do we like this or that and then sometimes had, like, too much too much overwhelm like, okay, ground. But it’s really teaching people to take it slower. And to watch for all those telltale signs that we don’t always take the time to look at. It’s like, okay, I’m gonna kiss you on your on your right shoulder, and then I’m gonna play with your hair a little bit, and then we’re gonna kiss, and then I’m going to play with your boobs, grab your butt, and then yeah, like, you’re gonna be ready for me. doesn’t quite work that way.

Jaiya  21:26

Yeah, everybody has their own special formula, you know. And even then it’s like, it, it changes. It’s not like it’s a formula that is there one day, and it’s always there. It’s like, okay, now you’re going through menopause. Now you’re, you know, you just had a baby, there’s, you’re stressed that day, there’s so many things that can play a role, which is why I think the biggest tool that we can teach is awareness. So like you were saying, like, okay, like, pay attention to the goosebumps on the arm, pay attention to what’s happening in the breath, pay attention to how your partner is responding to touch and learn what those things mean, because goosebumps may mean, they’re cold. Or it could mean that that feels really, really good. You know, like, what, what are the things that you’re learning, and I think learning about sexes is challenging, because so much of our ego can get wrapped up and I did it wrong, you don’t really like it, like all these stories, or all this energy that’s already between a couple, versus being able to just drop in and say, I’m just learning and it’s just information and it’s okay, I’m not getting it wrong or right. It’s just about my partner’s body, it’s

Juliette Karaman  22:34

probably one of the best ways to connect again. And for a lot of people, I, you know, I’ve had some couples come to me after 23 years of marriage where they haven’t had sex for like over 15 or 20 years, but and they’re like, we still love each other, but there’s just no spark. And then to take the whole pressure off, like you said, just like, take it out, let’s, let’s come together, I put really short time periods on them, because just to build their capacity, like for three minutes, we’re going to touch this fact. Because I’ve just noticed that people blow out really quickly. If I say 15 minutes, and I go, Oh my God, I don’t know if I could do like that for three minutes to five minutes or 10 minutes. Because that’s also something people just like then say, Okay, I’m gonna go for it. But then after half an hour there, or 20 minutes are already full and energetically, they can’t take anything anymore. So I think that’s one of the things that I tell people is like, just slow down and just take a little increments, and it’s all about information. You’re just gathering. You’re like a little detective. After 23 years of marriage, you’re getting to know your partner’s body better than you probably ever had. Yeah, I

Jaiya  23:52

mean, I think that this is something just like when we’re little kids, and we just play, you know, we lose this. learning through play, we learn this exploration and sex become so serious. It’s like, Oh, it’s this thing. Like, no, it’s keep playing. Keep exploring, and I think it’s something we lose and that we need to consciously create, to get back. Get back to play.

Juliette Karaman  24:23

To play get back to pleasure, I know that you always talk about pleasure. First, you want to give our listeners a bit of a just a little taste what pleasure first meets.

Jaiya  24:34

Yeah, so pleasure. First. They came but just because we were looking at our business, actually in our company and, and our lifestyle and how we were what were the things we wanted to be really congruent. And for me, pleasure first was a lifestyle that we wanted to create and also within our community and within our company. This idea that pleasure is fuel for the rest of your life. If and if your pleasure tank is empty, then you know you’re missing out on some of the fuel that you could have for everything else in your life. And so we started this idea that we always put pleasure first. So even before I got in this interview, I had two hours of being in pleasure. And you know, not everybody has to take two hours, it could be five minutes, it could be, you know, just conscious like, Okay, well, what would bring me more pleasure right this moment, and I love just asking me it myself that question, how could this moment be even more pleasurable. And so before I start my day, I have my Oh, vitamin, I have pleasure, I have something that’s going to put fuel in my tank. And some people might call that self self care. But I really like to put that even further into, well, maybe you have a self pleasure practice that you do every day. Maybe you have a Tantra practice that you do every day. Maybe it’s celebrating your goals and things that we celebrate, I think that we often run past our goals instead of going well let me drop in and really be grateful that my life has these things within it. So gratitude, actual real self pleasure, self care, all of this is part of this idea of pleasure first.

Juliette Karaman  26:22

Beautiful, right and really being present with what is in your life, what’s going well in your life. I had that. And when when I first said pleasure to people that were like, no, don’t don’t talk to me about pleasure. It’s like taboo bad words. So Right. And we all got bad from from from certain from from Facebook, and Instagram and other other Yeah, whatever social media platforms for even saying the word pleasure. So for me, I’ve turned to scrumptious pneus. And that, for me is like the Chi, the lifeforce, the pleasure, the orgasm that’s running through us that we all have access to. But we’ve just forgotten how. So you by actually taking that pleasure by by doing your your pleasure, first practice every day. It’s like you fill your own tank. And we all talk about this in the coaching worlds, like, oh, you need to fill your own tank. And it’s like, what I take a bath and I give them get a massage, and I do this and that’s like, what are the little things that bring you joy? Can it be looking at the sunshine, or the moon or smelling a flower or touching your your baby’s head? All of these are what fills your tank?

Jaiya  27:37

Yeah, I love that you said the little things and also meeting you know what life is, I think, the last few years, I’ve spent a lot of time just watching leaves or the sunset or listening to birds. And that those those little and they’re free, you know, there’s like so you and you’re playing in your own body and being in nature, these things are free. And I think there’s also a place to where we become it. Where it’s no longer like through my pleasure practice at any any rate, you know, there’s no longer a separation between me and pleasure. It’s just like I am the pleasure I am the scrumptious woman you know, I am the thing as opposed to like, it’s a thing that now I have to get, you know, and it becomes that I generate pleasure. I’m actually generating this thing from within not a I have to take a bath or get a massage and and then what an interesting practices is, even in the the hard moments of life, can I still find pleasure even in? Can I because I’m generating pleasure? Instead of me going, Oh, this isn’t pleasurable or being in a place of preference. My question often is, well, how does this moment then become pleasurable? And because I’m generating it from within, not something I’m getting outside of me based on circumstances in my life.

Juliette Karaman  29:02

It’s beautiful, right? And really that awareness of who we are the drop where the ocean where the water where the wave where everything. And it comes through us to others to ourselves, and it’s just where a lot. And I know this gets into the more spiritual stuff, which Yeah, the blueprints are also a way to really get to that part.

Jaiya  29:27

Yeah, I think that there’s actually to be Yeah, I think that there’s actually like, there’s this journey right of, of knowing who we are. And in eroticism, it’s like, well, who are you as an erotic being? And when we start to go on that journey, it’s like, oh, I’m an energetic. I’m wired energetically and then you start to expand and then start to expand into other Blueprints after you know, you really honour who you are and you get fed and who you are in that moment. And then before you know it, you’re a shapeshifter. Almost everybody who works with this modality becomes a shapeshifter after a you know, six months a year, they still, you know, can kind of default back into their place they started but we become a shapeshifter. And then there’s this interesting thing that happens like, okay, now I know myself and I’m, I’m going on this journey and I’m utilising some of the tools. And then there’s this place of just beingness. That’s beyond these identities. And, and that’s interesting to me, like, I’m always interested in like, well, what’s the place beyond the identity? What’s the place where we actually utilise stepping into an identity really richly? And then that takes us beyond to this other place? And putting words to that place is challenging, but there is a place where then you become a choice. Okay, I’m going to be a shapeshifter today, okay, I’m going to be an energetic today, okay, I’m going to be because you can put on any identity and to me, that’s that that is a lot of freedom. There’s a lot of freedom in my eroticism to say, Okay, I’m going to be somebody in the bedroom. No, I’m now I’m the Tom Shreeka. Now I’m to have all of these different beautiful, amazing faces, that I’m now at choice to put on and play with, because I freed myself out of all of the identities.

Juliette Karaman  31:17

It’s such a beautiful way, right? Like you said, we’re all we have these points of view, we have these identities as personas that we take on. And then when we’ve moved through them, when we’ve duplicated them when we’ve we’ve lived through them and actually are able to just be a choice, and everything just drops away. And it’s like, okay, what to what I feel like today. And it also, I’ve noticed where then it becomes really easy. It just kind of like life is just really fun. I kind of like you kind of like shrug your shoulders when people get like really upset and you’re like, Okay, what the big deal is, but what is your what’s your next step? What do you want with erotic blueprints with what do you want to achieve? Where do you want to go the next 10 years.

Jaiya  32:12

I mean, the, the blueprints, I feel like I’ve left a legacy. And that was part of the vision, part of the vision was okay, I want to leave a legacy of a new way for us to think about sexuality, a way for us to play, you know, in in truly knowing ourselves and eroticism, of helping people get to a shame free place with it all. And I think that that, you know, talking about identities, it’s like, well, when you are free of all the identities, there’s no shame in anything that you want to play or play it with. And we stop asking, Who am I and we start going, what’s the experience that I actually want to have are free to choose those experiences and, and so in some way, I feel like I’ve completed my dharma, you know, especially now that this book is here. And that was kind of my last step is now I’ve left this book and there’s all these coaches and the blueprints being a household name, I can see it just like the love languages or something like that, where most people will have this as part of their sex education growing up I. And so that’s been something I’ve been passionate about it, as you know, for the last 30 years. But where I’m headed next is a really good question. You know, I have a deep desire to go a lot more spiritual and my own path and get back to some of my roots that I had when I was younger, more time looking at trees. I’m writing I’m doing a lot of writing, I’m doing a lot of music. Because I feel like this mission consumed most of me for the last 30 years, you know, working eight hour a weeks and even though there’s pleasure in there still like it’s a lot, you know, to build a big business and to touch millions of people and speak all over the world and do all the things that I’ve done. I feel very complete in it. And so I think what I’d like to see in the next 10 years is just humanity. Humanity elevating their consciousness. I’d like to see some of these polarised ideologies that have happened, especially here in the United States coming into unification instead of so much duality. I’d love to just see more self realisation on this planet and, and I think around sexuality specifically. This idea and this comes very much from Buddhist or tantric ideas, but that we can utilise sexual energy to transmute some of these hard things in the world. You know, we can utilise our sexual energy to transmute that into unconditional love for all beings. You know, I I’d love to see the liberation of all beings in the next 10 years. I think that’s a little ambitious. But, you know, why not?

Juliette Karaman  35:08

Let’s have an ambitious goal, right? And when you started this, that was ambitious too. But it’s, it’s you hit a point, which is so true. And I know that a lot of youngsters, so I work with people 40 plus, and then you know, 40 5060s 70s sometimes and then I have these tweens that I call them so late teenagers to mid 20s, that are really interested in spirituality and that are massively open, and psychic, and they are feeling guilty. They are watching what’s happening in the world everywhere, people being bombed, people being robbed, families being ripped apart, and not just the Middle East, but But everywhere. And they’re like, but how can we live life and still have meaning in our life. So there’s a lot of survivor’s guilt going on there. And I talk to my twins who are here this weekend, you’re 22. And they’re like, Mommy, but you know, everything that’s going on, and I can’t complain. It’s gotten a ticket on her on her car or something. She’s like, Oh, annoying, and I but I can’t complain, I’m like, you can still feel but you can feel that everything that’s going on, and you’re massively empathic, but it doesn’t have to take away that you can still feel pleasure, you can still feel joy. And I think there’s a crosswire a lot in suffering of the world, and that we have to feel their pain, and that we have to stay in that pain.

Jaiya  36:40

Yeah, I mean, if you’re drowning in the river, you can’t help anybody else out of the river. So there’s something to staying on the banks, you know, feeling empathy, definitely. But you can’t dive in with everybody. And I’ve learned that in my life, because oftentimes, you know, I’d want to dive in with them, like, Oh, if I dive into the rushing river, I’ll be able to help. But, you know, one thing I’ve learned in my life is, can’t save everybody. You know, you can’t, you can’t be in this saviour role of I’m going to, you know, fix, save, change, improve. But you can have empathy, you can hold out your hand, and if someone grabs your hand, then you pull them out, you help pull them out. So that’s, I think that’s the main thing, because I definitely in my past would have had a more of a martyr thing, like, let me get in the water with you and drown alongside with you. Why don’t you get out of the water, and I’ll drown for you. You know, I’m done with those days.

Juliette Karaman  37:46

And I can imagine that a lot of us have that or who are very empathic and Seagal do the work for you. But that’s one of the thing that’s shown up for me as well. The most over these last 10 years or so it’s like, you can’t do the work for someone. Or you can’t want something for someone more than they want it themselves. Yeah, I no one is no one. Yeah, fix there. No one’s broken. Yep,

Jaiya  38:10

nobody’s broken. And I think that’s hard for some people to hear. Because they think like, Oh, me, I’m the broken one. And the truth is, we’re all whole and it’s just coming to that realisation and peeling back the things that have you you know, the conditioning and the programming that have you blocked from that wholeness. I also something that I learned from a woman named Michelle masters I think you may know her to Juliet, but was about unconscious family loyalties, you know, that was a really big needle mover for me was, okay, how am I because it’s not a limiting belief. It’s about the love that I have for someone else. And, you know, it was like, okay, that’s even harder to reprogram, because it’s because it’s coming out of my heart, it’s coming out of my love that, oh, if I love you enough, then then you’ll heal you know, or if I, if I don’t, if I’m not any better than you, you know, in terms of like success or anything, then it’ll be okay. Or how we limit ourselves or think that we could change or fix someone else. If I do your work for you then then you know, and that all of that is beautiful because it comes out of love but it doesn’t work. I mean, anybody listening to this can go okay, have I actually has it ever worked for me to try to change another human being my parents or my mom or my kids? Does that ever work? So but it comes from love, it comes because you care. And but there is a different way there’s the way of just being with someone, just be who you are with another being and lead by example.

Juliette Karaman  39:49

Completely and I remember that that session with her she was incredible. And there were so many aha moments of the unconscious as far as family believes. But why You’re saying is being with someone. I mean, I’ve had this in my family and put some clients that I’ve actually helped them pass over. And it’s one of the most beautiful things that he can just be present with them. You don’t have to fix them. You don’t have to fix their pain. You don’t have to do anything, but just be present with them. Help them through some stuff. Process some things get get clarity about letting go and surrendering to, to the Ever After.

Jaiya  40:34

Yeah, it’s the ultimate surrender. Maybe it’s the ultimate orgasm and don’t know, orgasmic death. There’s a taboo topic. But, you know, I love that. That’s been another exploration for me. It’s just been this preparation for dying, you know? And as we enter this, I know, I still have many, probably many years. Who knows, I mean, I could die tomorrow we don’t we never know when that day is gonna come but but this idea of as I’ve made everything pleasurable in my life, could death be a pleasurable process? Could that become something that we let go with ease we surrender with ease, just like when we let go into an orgasm? What what do all these different cultures say about death? And, you know, they call it a piglet, petit mole, we, you know, we’re talking about this little death that every orgasm is maybe it’s all just practice, maybe the rest of life is just practice in preparation for this really big event. And we all go through this really big event, but we don’t talk about it. And I just find that really fascinating. Like, we’re all going to go through this event, and it’s a really big event. And yet, we don’t have proper preparation. I don’t know maybe that’s my next frontier, proper preparation suite. As we go into this thing called it’s dropping our body dying to.

Juliette Karaman  41:58

Yeah, dropping this body search, right. And it’s, I’ve led a few clients through it and actually just preparing them and preparing their estates and everything. And it’s been a really beautiful journey, like you say, it’s like, just being with what is and it’s, yeah, such say, I see where, where this could be a next thing.

Jaiya  42:18

Yeah, I had an experience. This was earlier this year, it was about 1212 months ago, and I had an experience where someone played me, Laurie Anderson has this journey through the Bardo. And the Bardo, for those of you don’t know, and Todrick in Tibetan Buddhism is like, after you die, you go through these different realms, and you meet different characters along the way. And, you know, there’s opportunities to break the Wheel of Karma and all kinds of fun, interesting things. Anybody can look that up. And if you want to know more, but someone took me through it. And it was so fascinating to be with, like, oh, yeah, I got this part, I got this part. But this part, oh, to watch, like, where I would go into suffering, or I would struggle or like the rest would be fun or interesting. And that was a really like, momentous experience in my life to have an experience of dying before I died. And someone led me me through that process. And I think that that’s part of what got me just thinking of, what about this process of death and how we we don’t prepare and we don’t think about it, we don’t want to talk about it. We don’t want to be with people who are dying, but it’s so beautiful. You know, there’s so much beauty and in horrifying and you know, there’s hard moments too, but everything he was somebody in that. Yeah.

Juliette Karaman  43:41

Yeah. Who knows that might be your next passion.

Jaiya  43:51

Can we make this orgasmic too?

Juliette Karaman  43:53

I really do. Thank you when we can, I mean, I’ve seen enough people go and just their whole bodies in delight and like in such joy and surrender, that’s like, Oh, my God, you know, is this really what it’s like and then feeling the whole whole energy move over? So your book goes live tomorrow. But yeah, this podcast will go live on Friday. When our uniform people buy the book in Europe.

Jaiya  44:26

Yeah, so there will be a UK edition of the book. So that will be available in Europe and I think also Australia and some other places around your neck of the world. I think that will be available around February. And I know the audio book also will be coming out in February as well of 2024. So I know podcasts live for a while. So we’re talking 2024 and but the book is available you know most bookstores will will have it here in the in the next week. prefer you don’t want to wait for the UK edition

Juliette Karaman  45:05

super super, super cool. So I think everyone should buy this book and have it on your bookshelf dip into there are tonnes of experiential experiences right there are you’re taking people through an experience it’s not just read and then you know put it down but it’s like read Yeah, implement embody it get to know yourself

Jaiya  45:31

yeah there’s pleasure first exercises there’s a body it’s which helps you embody whatever you’ve been learning. There’s also just like journal exercises. So it really is a journey I set the book up to be a journey for people to help them take off the conditioning and programme and really look at well what’s true for me.

Juliette Karaman  45:52

Beautiful, Jaya, let us know how can people get in touch with your organisation? How can they find out more about the blueprints? This will get in the show notes.

Jaiya  46:03

Yeah, they can go to they can go to erotic breakthrough.com Erotic breakthrough.com They can also visit my site. It’s Jaya J A iya dot love L O V E. So Jaya dot love.

Juliette Karaman  46:19

Love it. Thank you so much for being on. I’ve completely enjoyed it. spin a little world around everywhere. And that’s that’s what we do.

Jaiya  46:33

Love it. Thank you so much for having me. It’s been such a pleasure. And I love that you’re having this conversation and you’re doing this show because, you know, creating conversation compassion and community you’re doing it.

Juliette Karaman  46:46

That’s it. I’m loving it. I’m having you all are having some some incredible people on and I love that. You know, I was given this opportunity to be you. Thank you. All right, my lovelies, this is it as always, please rate subscribe and let us know what you loved about it.

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